Scrubs Funniest Quotes Season 5

Scrubs Funniest Quotes Season 5 Episode 3 My Day at the Races

Dr. Kelso (to Turk, who just operated on a woman using hypnosis instead of anesthesia) - Hell, without anesthesia, you made it halfway through a surgery. I bet you could publish that.

Dr. Cox - Maybe they'll put it in Almost Magazine.

Scrubs Funniest Quotes Season 5 Episode 3 My Day at the Races

J.D. (about the new employees at the nurse station) - Where did all of these unsupervised children come from?

Scrubs Funniest Quotes Season 5 Episode 8 My Big Bird

Patient - I'm a garbage man. How many times a day do you think I get thanked?

Turk - Six!

Patient - You're off by about six

Turk - Twelve!

Scrubs Funniest Quotes Season 5 Episode 10 Her story

Julie - J.D.'s parents thought he was gonna be a girl.

They didn't have a name when he was born. So until he was three, they called him Joanna.

Dr. Cox - I don't know who you are, but thank you for this. *kiss her*

Scrubs Funniest Quotes Season 5 Episode 10 Her story

J.D. and Julie (Mandie Moore) are faking sex because they overslept and didn't have time to do it.

Julie: Oh, yeah! Don't stop!

J.D.: Pull my hair! [squeals]

Julie: Shut up and take it, you stupid bitch!

 Scrubs Funniest Quotes Season 5 Episode 17 My Chopped Liver

Todd - I just thought about flat boobies and it made me mad.